Monthly Archives: July 2017

Politics and the death of integrity and character.

I don’t identify with our political two-party system.  I am fiscally conservative but believe in social responsibility. I have been blessed and don’t mind paying my fair share of taxes.  I think if you are healthy and able, you should be working in order to put food on the table.  I believe in a woman’s right to choose and yet I can’t stomach abortion.  I believe in the second amendment.  I believe in universal healthcare.

You can’t fit me into a box of political making and I firmly believe if you agree to put yourself into one of those boxes you are selling yourself short.  Policy is important and so is integrity, character, leadership, and honesty.  For this reason I am struggling to support many of our politicians on both sides of the aisle.

We are a nation divided.  We are torn between policy, politicians and our values.  I see so much hypocrisy, especially on Facebook.  I see church-going people post pictures of their kid in church and then use the word libtard and whiners in their next status update.  I see celebrities take pictures of a headless Trump and people defending it because “they did it to Obama too.”  NO.  Right is right and wrong is wrong.  More people need to stand up for what is right.

INTEGRITY:  firm adherence to a code of especially moral or artistic values.

CHARACTER:  the complex of mental and ethical traits marking and often individualizing a person, group, or nation.  moral excellence and firmness.  (Merriam-Webster)

The death of integrity and character is upon us.  We expect Congress to work together on healthcare but we can’t stop ourselves from spewing hatred on social media and at each other.  Change needs to happen.  We need to hold our politicians accountable and we need to hold ourselves accountable.   Be the change you want to see in the world and all that.  It starts with us.

So be brave.  If someone victimizes another because of their race or religion then speak up regardless of your affiliation or political party.  If you don’t support the President but someone disrespects him to such a disgusting length, then please speak up!  Don’t spread the toxic nature that is growing like a weed between the citizens of this great country.

Stop making excuses and don’t justify horrible behavior.  Don’t use someone’s past transgressions as a justification for present transgressions because quite frankly, it doesn’t make it right, it only makes it petty.

Be brave.  Be human.  Be true.

And for goodness sake….vote more and hold all candidates to a higher standard.  Our values as Americans are on the line and it’s not pretty.

The lesson your kids may be missing.

This week was a tough parenting week.  Worst week ever!    My motherhood crown came flying off of my head.  I handed in the trophies and went into a corner and wallowed in cluelessness and self-pity.  My weakest personality trait reared its ugly head and served me a nice big cup of wake the hell up coffee.  I also had a bit of an epiphany so it’s all good.

So that’s what I’m going to cryptically write about today.  This week I have realized that I was the weakest link in my sons’ perspective on life and the people around him.  I taught him how to be kind to others but I didn’t fully teach him how to be compassionate to himself.

You see, I always see the good in people.  ALWAYS.  I’m a typical victim.  I’m the girl who dated guys that were bad for her because, well, there were good moments too.  I’m the friend who put up with so much negative bullshit because sometimes that friend was actually kind and supportive.  I’m the person who will put herself last and put others first even when they absolutely don’t deserve it.  I’m an annoying optimist and pride myself on my own strength.  That strength is also a weakness because I will hold up the world alone, to my own detriment and sing “Don’t Worry Be Happy.”

When I was younger, my mom told me that sometimes people are just not good for you.  In fact, I’ve given her that advice also.  Why would I listen to my own advice?  I have now taught my children to see the goodness in everyone and it’s blowing up in my face.   When you don’t teach your children to hold others accountable for their actions or inaction, you are invalidating their worth.

Invalidating their worth.

The truth is that some people are jerks.  Some people are selfish and not everyone shares your values.  Going into a situation and automatically believing that someone who has already let you down over and over will change or switch gears is just a fantasy.  If it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck it’s a duck.  No it’s not a prince or a friend, it’s a damn duck.

Actions speak louder than words.

So I have reversed course a bit with the kids.  Be kind but be kind to yourself and others.  Forgive those who want to be forgiven, not the person who will take a dump on you again.  Don’t sacrifice yourself to save someone else.  YOU ARE WORTHY of all the love and support and friendship life has to offer and YOU CAN BE PICKY about who you give your own love and time and support to.  STOP wasting time with people who take take take and then take again.  You know who your true friends are so stop wasting time with the ones that just don’t matter.

Mic drop.