I was extremely nervous, on the verge of getting physically ill, as I drove to my friend’s photo studio to pose for some fun pictures for my blog. When I say fun what I really mean is the kind of fun one experiences when they stab themselves in the eye with a pencil. Whenever I get in this state I tend to either obsess ALOT or do something completely unrelated five minutes prior to having to leave for my appointment or task. I chose the latter. The day of my photo shoot I decided I would wrestle with my infuriating duvet cover, resulting in being a bit tardy and getting myself lost, or at least more lost than I would be on a normal day. The duvet cover won the battle and I left it strewn across my bed in a heap of wrinkles, covering a comforter that was turned in the wrong direction. By the time I finally fell into bed that night I didn’t care one iota that the darn thing didn’t fit right. In fact, it is still turned in the wrong direction.
I know I’m not the only woman to avoid being in pictures but for me, to actually seek out a photo session, is an extraordinary act of courage. This avoidance does not include selfies by the way. The ability to pose using your phone and see exactly what you will look like in the picture YOU take and control is simply brilliant! Note, what is NOT brilliant is the selfie one takes in front of a mirror. Come on people, time for reverse camera mode!
I’m not sure if you know this but professional photographers do not let you view each picture after they take them. They also do not permit you to rip their digital camera out of their hands and quickly push the trash icon. This presented a bit of a control challenge for me and I had to let go and trust that my friend would use Photoshop as needed. I don’t mean to be insensitive to all of the news articles that are in abundance today about models and photoshopping but let’s face it folks, us normal people would be totally cool with a nip or tuck in our pictures!
The photographer was very patient even when, during a post that was supposed to be serious or introspective, I would suddenly give into an urge to stick my tongue out or open my mouth very wide in a scream like way. This may be why my photos didn’t quite turn out the way I expected. My sweet friend was very kind and patient, doing her best to help me roll with poses and angles that felt extremely uncomfortable for me. I’m happy to say that she did have some interesting final concepts, one of which will be the new banner for my page.
I believe that pictures are difficult because we are our own worst critics. I would love to get to a point in my life where I ignore my perceived flaws and instead see the sparkle in my eye, the smile on my face and the spirit of a beautiful moment in my life. Until then I will fake it until I make it, being goofy in pictures and living with the end result!
(Photo Credit: Precious Posh Photography, Haymarket, VA)