Dance like no one’s watching is a fantastic idea unless your ten-year old child is recording your every dance move with your iPhone. Will Pharell’s new song “Happy” was playing in our kitchen and there I was, swinging my seven-year old around the room, letting the joy bubble out in the form of laughter and my mad dance moves.
Then I replayed the video…..and the smile disappeared from my face.
UGH, UGH, UGH! I hate that I am even writing this, I resent that this is even true, but instead of seeing the joy and laughter and the moment, I saw FAT. What the heck happened? I thought I was a twenty year old sex-pot who just happened to have a couple of kids, who just happened to be wearing sweatpants, but NOOOOOO! THERE WAS A MIDDLE AGED WOMAN DANCING AROUND MY KITCHEN!
When did this happen? Who let her into my house?
So we danced again. And this time I sucked in my stomach and I tried a different move or two. I replayed the video again. That same woman was still there! My children got a real kick out of my frustration and I believe we moved right from the dance to chocolate chip cookies. Hmm….perhaps there’s a link to this mystery!
Now I’m laughing at myself so it’s all good I guess.
Be Your Own Kind of Beautiful. My friends think I’m joking but one day I will seriously put on the purple pants and I will don a purple hat. I will embrace my right to be even tackier than I am today and I won’t care one iota about my dance moves. It’s slowly happening, I must warn you! My goal is to be the happiest and healthiest purple-wearing, magenta lipstick glowing, white-haired diva you have ever seen.
That day is not today.
Although the reality is that I am closer to 50 than 40 and it is starting to show, I am finding it difficult to beat myself up over it. I suppose that is healthy. I would hate to be one of those women who wake up and put on all of their makeup before her husband can see her in the morning. Actually, the truth is I just don’t have the energy.
Midlife is tough because you make friends with other moms “your age.” Your age becomes anywhere between 30 and 50 years of age. You may laugh maniacally when you realize you are five or ten years older than your thin friends and you realize they have no clue what is in store for them. You may giggle like a crazy woman in the grocery store when you see new mommas with two young children and you feel insanely happy that your kids can wipe themselves. Perhaps you are that crazy woman who then laughs out loud?
It’s all good. You may dance around the kitchen and watch your video recording afterwards and decide to go to yoga the next day. Perhaps you wanted to puke during that yoga class and are still recuperating three days after the fact? Well, here’s my advice to you…..
Dance like no one’s watching and make sure your iPhone is locked.
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