Recently when giving advice to one of my sons I used the typical cliché “just be yourself!” His response to my sage advice was to say “Yes, but who am I?” Those words made me pause. Take a second to answer that question for yourself. Who are you? If you search the internet for the phrase “Who am I?” you will find many answers including:
- I am strong
- I am beautiful
- I am worthy
- I am enough
- I am honest
- I am kind
What you don’t see is:
- I am selfish
- I am narcissistic
- I am insecure
- I am materialistic
Our children don’t yet have the answer to this question. This question “Who am I?” is answered through experience and how we are taught (or not taught) how to handle adversity, success and failure. This question is answered through living. The answer to this question is earned, and yet I had to answer my son’s question. I had to answer his question in such a way that it gave him something to strive for.
The answer I gave him was communicated through words and a picture. I took out a baby picture of him, one that showed the huge smile on his face, the innocence in his eyes and the purity of his soul. “This is who you are at the core. As the years pass you may get jaded and may hide your true self, your true light. The key is to let it shine and to stay good, to stay positive and to see the beauty of life. Laugh and smile at those you meet. If they don’t return your friendship or they have decided to be someone who hurts you, be confident in your choice to let them go. Be true.”
Be the kind of person you would want to meet. The truth is people will answer that question for you. They will decide who you are every single day. Your actions will tell the real story.
The older we all become, the more difficult this is. Just be yourself. Just shine. Don’t apologize for your idiosyncrasies, embrace them! This is my wish for my boys.
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